These uncouplings, though sometimes “conscious” all played out in a very public way - thanks to the prying eyes of the paparazzi. But there’s a whole other world of divorce drama that some people might not even be aware of. And a pluckarazzi that could put the Hollywood paps to shame. An online community has been closely following a flock of fabulous and (now) free, feathered divorcees. They’ve been sharing photos, along with what they believe are the bittersweet backstories of bird break-ups. Scroll on for some of the most brilliant ones and don’t forget to upvote your favorites. According to Forbes magazine, the average cost of a divorce in the U.S.A. in 2024 is between 15,000 and 20,000 U.S Dollars. That’s quite a pretty penny to spend on dismantling a nest. Imagine doing it twice? Or even thrice?
While the stories here are fictional and all in the name of fun, it appears some might not be too far from the truth. Research shows that 90% of bird species are monogamous, meaning they stick to one mate, at the very least for a full breeding season. Some even go the extra mile and mate for life. Among the most monogamous are the black vulture, bald eagle, laysan albatross, mute swan, barn owl and of course, lovebirds…
Just like some famous Hollywood celebs, gentoo penguin girls expect a big, polished rock before committing. So once a young male penguin has found his perfect mate, he’ll need to search for the perfect pebble to match her beauty. He’ll scour the shore in his black and white tuxedo and once he’s found one fit for a princess, he’ll carefully pick it up with his beak. The hopeful bachelor will then carry it across the beach, present it to his soon-to-be fiancee and propose. After the ceremony, the couple continues to search for pebbles together, laying a rock solid foundation for their life as a married couple. The pebbles will become the perfect love nest in which they start their family. But all’s fair in love and war… and penguin passion doesn’t come without drama. If a guy can’t find the perfect pebble, some will resort to stealing one from another couple’s nest - causing all sorts of crazy chaos. While most birds are in it for the long haul, sometimes things fall apart. Not only do birds really get “divorced” - but bird divorce is on the rise. It’s actually something scientists have been studying for decades. “Needless to say, the notion of avian divorce bears little resemblance to what we think of as divorce,” he added. “The concept is simply a convenient way for ornithologists to measure mate fidelity.” No long drawn-out court battles, no legal fees, no splitting of assets, no parenting plans, no alimony. Just a “Thanks for the memories. I’m out.” Imagine. Is it any surprise some of these birds look like one flew over the cuckoo’s nest? The paper states: “Our results showed that only male promiscuity, but not female promiscuity, had a positive relationship with divorce rate. Furthermore, migration distance was positively correlated with divorce rate, whereas adult mortality rate showed no direct relationship with divorce rate.” They found that “plovers, swallows, martins, orioles and blackbirds had both high divorce rates and male promiscuity, whereas petrels, albatrosses, geese and swans had low divorce rates and male promiscuity.” Yet data shows that they too have been calling it quits more often in recent years. Scientists wanted to know why, so they scrutinized the divorce documents over a period of 18 years. It turns out there is a third party involved. But it’s not what you might think. The study notes that some broody females get impatient, and take flight with a new flame. Others just get sick of raising their kids alone and fall into the warm wings of a more available lover. So if you need another reason to take climate change to heart… Look no further than into the eyes of that forlorn fowl who just got dumped.
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