Redditor McGhostShadow was one of Danielle’s gay friends for quite a while, and everything was going great. They did artistic things, tried new places, and met regularly at her house. However, after she had a baby, her husband began to suspect them of cheating because his daughter didn’t look like him. Within six weeks, these accusations got so out of hand that the lives of those around them became a living hell.
Having a queer friend who supports you can be a great experience
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However, this husband wasn’t fond of his wife’s and his gay coworker’s friendship and even accused them of cheating
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The author provided an update
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Research highlights the positive qualities of straight women’s and gay men’s friendship
Admittedly, relationships between straight women and gay guys have been less researched compared to friendships between heterosexual people. However, in those rare instances where this unique bond was observed, studies underline its positive qualities. One reason why such friendships work so well is that homosexual men tend to provide women with the kind of attention straight guys can’t. For example, women feel that queer males accept and cherish them more for their inner beauty than their appearance. That said, females reported being overall more confident in their bodies than those who don’t have gay companions. They also admit having more honest and secure friendships than with straight individuals, male or female. In addition, research shows that gay men cherish their straight girlfriends as well. One study found that they see their female friends as the main source of advice about their romantic relationships. Intrigued by this, Eric Russell, a researcher in social psychology, wanted to see if this bond is so unique because they can provide each other with honest, unbiased romantic advice. Share icon Image credits: Allan Mas/Pexels (not the actual photo)
Women feel overall more comfortable with gay men, as they don’t have to worry about their sexual intentions
Since they aren’t competing for the same love interests and aren’t sexually attracted to each other, they have the space to develop a deeper bond and a sense of trust. During his research, Russell found that to be especially true when it comes to feedback about romantic affairs. The study revealed that straight women considered the romantic recommendations of gay men to be significantly more reliable than those of straight individuals. Similarly, gay men found straight women more trustworthy when it comes to love life advice and even perceived them as significantly more helpful in finding a potential partner. Russell told NBC News, “On average, I would say gay men and straight women probably trust each other around 20 percent more than other individuals.” He wasn’t surprised by the findings, but what he found interesting was that both parties were equally assured of each other. Additionally, a more novel study in 2018 by Russell and his team found that women overall feel more comfortable interacting with gay versus straight men, largely because male sexual intentions are no longer a worry that women have to think about. After their experiment, Russell concluded that “explicit knowledge of a man’s sexual preference not only increased a woman’s comfort with a gay man (vs. a straight man), but also affected the degree to which the women (particularly attractive ones) were willing to engage with the man on a more intimate level.”
Commenters were appalled by the situation and tried to help the original poster with their recommendations
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