In some cases, the events preceding the wedding can tell you a lot about your ‘friends’ and where their priorities truly lie. One anonymous bride-to-be turned to the internet for advice after sharing how her friends started being incredibly cheap when the talk turned to the gifts, the bachelorette party, and the reception. Read on for the full story, as well as a very important update about what happened next. Bored Panda reached out to the author via Reddit, and we’ll update the article as soon as we hear back from her.
Your wedding should be a happy occasion that you want to share with the people closest to you
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One bride-to-be opened up about how she discovered how cheap and false her ‘friends’ really are
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Weddings cost a huge amount to organize. While guests can still end up spending lots, what they pay comes nowhere near the cost of the entire event
How big and elaborate the wedding will be will depend entirely on the couple’s preferences, financial means, and preferences. There’s really no ‘right’ way to throw a wedding! Some marrying couples prefer small and intimate events. Meanwhile, others want the fairytale ball with hundreds of guests, ice sculptures, champagne glass towers, 12-tiered cakes, and 5 wedding photographers. Do what makes you happy. According to research conducted by The Knot, in 2023, the average cost of a combined wedding and ceremony in the United States was $35,000. This is $5,000 more than in 2022, due to inflation and economic turbulence. Destination weddings cost around $41,000 in 2023, while hometown weddings were cheaper, averaging around $33,000. CNBC reports that based on the data collected by CouponBirds, it’s cheaper for partnered guests to go to weddings than to do so alone. Single women spend around $480 to attend weddings as guests while single men spend an average of $442 per wedding. Partnered women spend around $292 while partnered men shell out $254. The money is spent on gifts, parties, and accommodation.
Finding out that your closest friends might not consider you a friend of theirs can be incredibly painful
There’s no sugarcoating the situation that the author of the story found herself in: it’s genuinely awful. The bride-to-be opened up about how she lost her entire group of friends after her fiancé called a few of them out for how they treated her. Though it’s a very stressful, overwhelming, and depressing outcome, there is a silver lining. For one, there are no more illusions about who means what. The author knows that the people she had considered to be her true friends are anything but. While she was ready to make sacrifices for them, they weren’t prepared to do the same for her. While it hurts, the truth is preferable to living surrounded by lies and fake smiles. Another upside is that the woman’s partner has proven that he’s ready to stand up for her and do what’s necessary to protect her interests, no matter what. Though it probably would have been better for them to talk about how to proceed next to get on the same page, it’s a massive relief to know that the person you’re marrying is 100% on your side. That sort of loyalty is rare! Something that’s incredibly frustrating (and you might have experienced it at some point) is when your social circle can’t be transparent with you. They don’t mean what they say, they come up with excuses to get out of plans with you, or they straight-up ignore your questions, suggestions, and requests. Getting them to tell the truth is like pulling teeth. Painful. And certainly messy.
True friendship requires mutual respect. It’s not a one-side relationship!
Honestly, that’s not how things should be. Not to be too blunt or anything, but awful communication is a sign that there’s something wrong. It might be an indication that your friends don’t respect you as much as you do them. If you respect a person, you’re honest with them. You’re timely with your responses. And you’re genuinely happy for them when there’s something to celebrate! On the flip side, false and fairweather friends tend to be big on gossip, ignore your boundaries, enjoy manipulating you, and take advantage of you. For them, there’s no ‘give-and-take’; they only value the ‘take’ part. There are a few ways to tell if your friends aren’t as great as you assumed. Look at how they react when you ask them for a favor or some help, and contrast it to how you respond to the same requests. Do your ‘friends’ overpromise and underdeliver? Next, consider how they treat any sensitive information that you reveal to them. Why bother trusting someone who starts texting all of your secrets to their other pals the moment you get up to go home? Then, consider how your buddies react when something genuinely good happens in your life, like you getting engaged, promoted, having a kid, buying a home, etc. Good friends celebrate with you. Fake friends are envious and don’t want you to be successful. They find ways to put you down. What do you think of the entire story, dear Pandas? What advice would you give the author of the viral post? Have you ever had people in your life whom you realized were actually fake friends? How did you find out that they weren’t as awesome as they first appeared? If you have a spare moment, share your thoughts in the comments.
As the story spread across the internet, many readers wanted to give the author some heartfelt advice
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